Mrs. Astor's New York: Opulence and Power in the Gilded Age

Caroline Schermerhorn Astor, known as Mrs. Astor throughout New York, governed New York society for nearly four decades, when it was the world's most rigorous and exclusive. Mrs. Astor's reputation was such that being invited to her yearly ball, held on the third Monday in January every year, guaranteed being "in" society; not being asked meant living in the shadow. Or so it appeared to the many aspiring to attend the ball.

Huge riches had been amassed in the aftermath of the Civil War, and those who had made them - or rather, their spouses – wanted to flaunt their new money in Caroline Astor's social circle, the most renowned of them. Immense wealth, on the other hand, did not aid social inclusion; the Vanderbilts, who were almost as wealthy as the Astors and often had fancier homes, were well outside the threshold.

The vast ballroom of the Astor mansion on 34th Street and 5th Avenue

The Astor entire estate was originally established in the 1800s by German immigrant John Jacob Astor, and by the time Caroline married, it had become a synonym for wealth, majestic residences, and hotels – with a notoriety for excellent catering that would eventually find its most enduring monument in her son John Jacob Astor IV's splendid St. Regis hotel, built in the early 1900s.

Caroline herself hailed from “old” New York society, the Knickerbockers, an aristocratic tier made up of descendants of the initial English and Dutch founders. The world of the Knickerbockers was one of social decorum, with noble individuals living in respectable homes. They were lawyers and businesspeople with well-dressed but unobtrusive wives. Knickerbocker families wedded into each other's families and dined in each other's homes at an appropriately early hour. They were a clan, and they defended their exclusivity with zeal.

Mrs. Astor's greatest asset was her dignity, which was quickly followed by her prudence; she is never known to have said anything contentious. She could be nice, but she was never emotional or intimate. Caroline's husband, William Backhouse Astor, was known to be a raging alcoholic and even more ravenous philanderer, and another woman might have found it impossible to live down his conduct.

Caroline's tenure was known as the Gilded Age because of the vast sums of money that were made and squandered during her reign. Granite mantelpieces, Gobelins embroideries, bronzes, sculptures, and paintings swept up from Europe, oriental carpets, crystal chandeliers, and French furnishings adorned the enormous homes on Fifth Avenue. Graceful carriages drawn by shiny horses carried ladies in satin gowns and beautiful headgear between 4 and 5 p.m. on a summer day; in the winter, the same procession in horse-drawn sleighs took place in Central Park. The favors were vintage ivory fans, gold powder boxes, or sapphire lapel pins, with hundred-dollar bills stamped with the host's initials wrapped around.

Mrs. Astor greeting the guests at her ball

Mrs. Astor, photographed in the 1900s

Caroline Astor's ball, however, was the social pinnacle of the entire year. Its primary theme was opulence and pomp — you didn't go there to have fun, but to be seen. Caroline asked the particularly favored to sit with her on the red velvet sofa from which she overlooked the ballroom, and the magnificent home, filled with flowers, flashed with lights.

Outside Mrs. Astor's consecrated circle of acquaintance, ladies would go to any length to obtain an invitation, pleading through a third party, attempting to convince Ward McAllister, her assistant, that they had a grandmother of immaculate lineage, and, of course, giving dinner parties, musicales, and dances themselves, which were dutifully reported in the social sections of the day.

It was a continuous effort to stay at or near the top. Even inside the Astor family, there was squabbling. Caroline's nephew, William Waldorf Astor, waged a long battle with his aunt to have his wife Mamie positioned as Mrs. Astor - admittedly, he, William Waldorf, was the eldest son's eldest son, thus his wife should be entitled to this status. Caroline would not be moved, even after William Waldorf had his father's house demolished and replaced with a massive hotel to eclipse his aunt's property nearby. Her only remark was a scathing comment, "There's a glorified tavern next door." William Waldorf eventually left the United States for England in 1891, claiming that “America is no place for a gentleman.”

Caroline Astor did not lose her status until 1902. Grace Vanderbilt, a 32-year-old protégée of Caroline's, outsmarted her in a viciously clever ploy that resulted in Grace, rather than Caroline, entertaining the Kaiser's adored younger brother to luncheon. Caroline knew that was the final nail in the coffin. The astonishment spread throughout New York, and she, like all the other women who had attempted and failed to get an invitation to her ball, flew to Europe.